After the New Year I knew I had to do something! But first a little about myself.
I am a 34 yr. old Army Wife and Mother of 5. I started really struggled with my weight after my 3rd child. I worked out 6 days a week and actually started enjoy running. I never reached my goal I wanted and I was still consider overweight. But when we PCSed(moved) to Fort Hood Texas, I stopped taking care of myself. I can think of all the excuses I had not to workout or eat right: lived in a hotel for 3 weeks, didn't know where the gym was on Fort Hood, when we got our place I know had a 5 bedroom house to unpack, had to get the kids setup in school, doctor and dentist, it was the holidays(thanksgiving and then December)...the list goes on and on.
I tried to work out with a good friend. We both loved Zumba but I ended up hurting my foot and she had her baby and well I fell back to old habits. As I gained more weight the depression came. I am an emotional eater! I ate because I hated myself, I struggled to steer our two teenager to make good decisions and put most of my energy in begin the best mother to our 5 kids since my husband was gone a lot. My depression and stress got worse when my husband told me he volunteered to go to Afghanistan. I felt my world falling apart. He has already done 3 deployments to Iraq and the last deployment was the worse! Friends of ours were Killed in Action and injured severally. My husband, Mountain, was injured as well. I will never forget that 7:30am phone call for the D.A. He was lucky compare to others. He spent 4 months at the burn unit and I flew back and forth to Florida and Texas to see and care for him. I never want to go through that again. So you can see my fear of his deployment this time around.
Keep reading because this is when things changed for me....
During 2012 Christmas break we drove to Florida to visit my sister Jessica and my Mother Karon. My sister showed me a book that our Mom gave her called "Eat to Live". While my sister was at work one day I picked up the book and started reading it. The beginning of the book was things I already knew about because I had see a Nutritionist years before. But as I continued reading this started to make sense. I looked at food in a totally different way! Lets just say I finished the book with in about a week because I felt myself changing and started looking at food in a different way. I knew I had to do something because I had reached 200lbs and I am only 5ft!
I had a little pep talk with myself. I told myself I can NOT control what the Army does with my husband so while he is gone I am going to take care of what I DO have control over...my health, my weight, my emotions, my kids and our finances...yes our finances. So I started making goals for myself to benefit our family. I reached out for help and made my own weight loss group online and also started take Skinny Fiber. It is all natural which was really important for me! So my Journey Begins......
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I am a 34 yr. old Army Wife and Mother of 5. I started really struggled with my weight after my 3rd child. I worked out 6 days a week and actually started enjoy running. I never reached my goal I wanted and I was still consider overweight. But when we PCSed(moved) to Fort Hood Texas, I stopped taking care of myself. I can think of all the excuses I had not to workout or eat right: lived in a hotel for 3 weeks, didn't know where the gym was on Fort Hood, when we got our place I know had a 5 bedroom house to unpack, had to get the kids setup in school, doctor and dentist, it was the holidays(thanksgiving and then December)...the list goes on and on.
I tried to work out with a good friend. We both loved Zumba but I ended up hurting my foot and she had her baby and well I fell back to old habits. As I gained more weight the depression came. I am an emotional eater! I ate because I hated myself, I struggled to steer our two teenager to make good decisions and put most of my energy in begin the best mother to our 5 kids since my husband was gone a lot. My depression and stress got worse when my husband told me he volunteered to go to Afghanistan. I felt my world falling apart. He has already done 3 deployments to Iraq and the last deployment was the worse! Friends of ours were Killed in Action and injured severally. My husband, Mountain, was injured as well. I will never forget that 7:30am phone call for the D.A. He was lucky compare to others. He spent 4 months at the burn unit and I flew back and forth to Florida and Texas to see and care for him. I never want to go through that again. So you can see my fear of his deployment this time around.Keep reading because this is when things changed for me....
During 2012 Christmas break we drove to Florida to visit my sister Jessica and my Mother Karon. My sister showed me a book that our Mom gave her called "Eat to Live". While my sister was at work one day I picked up the book and started reading it. The beginning of the book was things I already knew about because I had see a Nutritionist years before. But as I continued reading this started to make sense. I looked at food in a totally different way! Lets just say I finished the book with in about a week because I felt myself changing and started looking at food in a different way. I knew I had to do something because I had reached 200lbs and I am only 5ft!
I had a little pep talk with myself. I told myself I can NOT control what the Army does with my husband so while he is gone I am going to take care of what I DO have control over...my health, my weight, my emotions, my kids and our finances...yes our finances. So I started making goals for myself to benefit our family. I reached out for help and made my own weight loss group online and also started take Skinny Fiber. It is all natural which was really important for me! So my Journey Begins......
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Mix Emotions~April 2013
You know those day when you don't know whether you should laugh, cry or be mad. Yeah its one of those days for me. Had a great morning walk with my girls...6 miles! I am excited that the Color Run is coming up this weekend. I am prepared...at least I hope. Talked to my hubbie today, sometimes its just easier not to see or talk to him. It makes me miss him even more. Can't wait for this deployment to be over. In the meantime I need to keep focus on my journey. My family is the reason I am doing this. It was a bit of a struggle this evening. I found myself about to emotionally eat, I was at a friends house so I was faced with donuts and cookies. I had 1 doughnut and you know, I didn't even finish eating it. I was gross to me, I didn't even enjoy it! That there is a milestone for myself. I have worked hard at looking at myself closely to find out what my triggers are and my weaknesses are. I keep at close eye on what I am feeling at the moment I am eating and also asking myself if I am actually hungry or is there more to it, usually there is a reason I am eating. I know I am an emotional eater and I am ok with that...because now that I know what to look for I am able to look at it differently and correct it. Tucking my boys to bed...Good Night
Finding Myself Again...
May 2013
It has been 4 month now since I have started my weight loss journey to a healthy lifestyle. At times it has been difficult with my husband gone and having so many kids but I just keep going! I find it easy to just keep going then giving up and starting all over again. I have learned love myself more and not be so judgmental with my imperfections. I have learned not to beat myself up if I miss workouts or even enjoy not so healthy foods. Life is short and I plan to enjoy it! I really try to eat 90% healthy and give myself 10% for my splurges. I feel as if I am more centered and understanding when it comes to my emotions of what life brings. I have been very honest about being an emotional eater and I have learn to really listen to my emotions when I start craving something not so healthy. I am on my second 90 day challenge with Skinny Fiber and I am really excited about it! I have had great success with the first 90 days. I started a little over 200lbs and now down to 175lbs and went from a size 20 to a size 14.
I have allowed myself to hide behind my weight for so many years and now i feel FREE to TRULY LIVE♥
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Vacation ♥One Life...Live It and Love It♥
So I am coming to the end of my summer vacation here in Maine. I have truly enjoyed myself visiting my family...its bitter sweet leaving BUT, I know I will be back next year and my husband homecoming is getting closer! I have defiantly done some soul searching while I have been here and have even learned a little more about myself. Let me tell you a little story about my 8 year old son Cooper who taught me something this summer... .We were at an amusement park in Mass this summer. He is now tall enough to ride the roller coasters with me:) There was a pretty big roller coaster called UNTAMED...the name alone is scary...LOL He begged me to go on it with him and I agreed. As we stood there in line and he had a smile on his face of both excitement and a little nervousness. As I am seeing grown men walk OUT of line as they got closer to the front, I bend down to my son and ask him if he really wanted to ride this. He said this to me..."Mom, I only have one life to live and I want to live and love it!" Seeing a child of that age say something so strong and so grown up made me so proud! My son does not truly realize what he said and then seeing him sitting next to me on the roller coaster as we travel straight up towards the sky about 4 stories high and then straight back down drop made me feel like a kid again as well!
I have learned to love my body as it is NOW! I have learned to have confidents in my imperfections. I careless what others think of me and more about telling myself how beautiful I am. I am still on this journey to lose weight....I still have great day and some not so good days but I NEVER have a "BAD DAY". As my son has taught me...Life is to Live and you should Love It... I never beat myself up if I eat something not so healthy(still everything in moderation) I know my weight loss journey is going to take time and I am ok with that♥
I have learned to love my body as it is NOW! I have learned to have confidents in my imperfections. I careless what others think of me and more about telling myself how beautiful I am. I am still on this journey to lose weight....I still have great day and some not so good days but I NEVER have a "BAD DAY". As my son has taught me...Life is to Live and you should Love It... I never beat myself up if I eat something not so healthy(still everything in moderation) I know my weight loss journey is going to take time and I am ok with that♥
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As I walk further into my weight loss journey I stop and think about how I use to talk about myself....out loud and in my own head. I hated myself, I hated my body and I just couldn't stand looking at myself, let alone shopping for clothes. There were many times I cried and because I felt bad I ate...I am an emotional eater. As I started my journey I stopped and reevaluate the things that was holding me back and the only thing I came up with was MYSELF. That is when I changed the way I did things. I started with a mini goals....I placed them on my Bathroom Mirror, my Kitchen and my Car. My goals were simple, drink "x" amount of water daily, workout "x" amount of days and the one thing I was so happy I did was but up this....
"Look into the mirror and say something
Positive about my self daily."
As I started doing this I actually started to love myself and feel as I deserved to do things for myself. As a busy Mom and Army Wife, a lot of things fall on my shoulders(especially when he is deployed). I was so wrapped up in taking care of everyone, I forgot about myself. Now that I am in a better place I never want to go back to "that person" I Love Myself and I tell myself "its OK to be kind to yourself". Society has it all twisted...What is Beautiful....
♥There is only one of you in this world...and that makes you Beautiful!♥
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I have imperfection
but they are mine and I have learned to love them for they set me apart from
everyone else. It took years for me to really truly LOVE myself and feel
comfortable in my own body. Yes I have cellulite, wrinkles, scars, freckles
that I hated for years and other things but it’s all a part of ME!
I remember I covered
my walls and ceiling in my room with magazine pages of models when I was a teen
as many do at that age. Growing up was awkward
at that age but I always thought I wasn’t the pretty girl or skinny girl in
high school. I didn’t have confident or good
self-esteem thanks to the guy I dated at that time. In fact I didn’t truly think I was pretty
until I married my husband because of the failed relationships I had been in,
in the past. I slowly started to realize
that it wasn’t me it was them….they had issues and just weren’t really men.
A little message to my 4 son’s….Please treat girls with
respect growing up. You could truly mold
how a girl thinks of herself because we look back at pass relationships and
sometimes carry the negative with us through the years. Be nice, kind and always speak to her like
you would want YOUR father to speak to me, your mother.
I was so tired of sitting on the sideline of life…I wanted
to be in the game. I wanted to be able
to throw the football with my boys. I wanted
to set a good example for them. Since on
my personal journey I found it wasn’t just a journey to lose weight but, to
find who I was again, learning to love myself and what my purpose was in this
world besides being a mother and wife. I
started to change the way I looked at myself in the mirror. Instead of being so negative to myself I
started to point out things I liked about myself. Step by step I started to find this woman in
the mirror who I never knew but I like her…I wanted to be her. She had confidents and a true smile on her
face.
I am not done with my journey…I am just getting started and
I still have a ways to go but I am loving every moment of life instead just
going through the motions. Some days are
better than others…Some days I laugh and some days I cry. But the most important thing I have learned
so far is NOT TO GIVE UP and JUST KEEP GOING.
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November 2014~ Life is GOOD..Life Flies By
Wow...how this year has flown by! My husband has official retired from the Army and we are settling into our new house we are renting. Its a beautiful home full of country rustic charm♥ I have fallen a bit of the wagon with my exercising and eating habits but I find myself not that far off! Skinny Fiber is helping me a ton with my portion control. I am starting up on the 25CK with a friend from FB. I will doing that program 3 times a week and T25 2 days a week! If you would like to join me on the running program just out the link below!
I am excited about what our new life will bring us!
I just celebrated my birthday...it was great to be around family again. Between the tug a war with the kids, my job and husband who is now home all day I am still a working progress and finding myself everyday that goes by....
Here is to another 36 yrs♫♫♫♫
Join me here in this event! Link below
www.facebook.com/events/1566463066901695/
Join my FREE weight loss support group
here..almost 10,000 members! Link Below
www.facebook.com/groups/JourneytoLoseSoMuchtoGain/
November 2014~ Life is GOOD..Life Flies By
Wow...how this year has flown by! My husband has official retired from the Army and we are settling into our new house we are renting. Its a beautiful home full of country rustic charm♥ I have fallen a bit of the wagon with my exercising and eating habits but I find myself not that far off! Skinny Fiber is helping me a ton with my portion control. I am starting up on the 25CK with a friend from FB. I will doing that program 3 times a week and T25 2 days a week! If you would like to join me on the running program just out the link below!
I am excited about what our new life will bring us!
I just celebrated my birthday...it was great to be around family again. Between the tug a war with the kids, my job and husband who is now home all day I am still a working progress and finding myself everyday that goes by....
Here is to another 36 yrs♫♫♫♫
Join me here in this event! Link below
www.facebook.com/events/1566463066901695/
Join my FREE weight loss support group
here..almost 10,000 members! Link Below
www.facebook.com/groups/JourneytoLoseSoMuchtoGain/
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